Wednesday, April 25, 2012

God's Goodness

I've been dealing with some health issues for a little while now, and it's been extremely frustrating.  It's frustrating to go to the doctor for them to only continue to guess at what might be the problem.  I'm not blaming doctors.  Some conditions can't be diagnosed through blood tests, and it's usually a game of elimination.  It becomes frustrating when the answers and solutions don't come, and when others don't understand.  To someone on the outside, it looks like I've just simply put on weight, because I'm lazy or eat too much.  But the truth is, that's not the case.  Weight gain in and of itself is hard to deal with.  It's even more difficult when it's literally painful.  I've cried many a night and prayed for God to fix it.  I've prayed to be back to where I was just a few years ago.  I've prayed for others not to judge me and make comments about my weight.  I've prayed for the painful swelling in my body to go away.  While I'll continue to pray for health and healing, I know that it may not come.  I may never be the size 2 I was just three years ago.  God has blessed me immensely and continues to do so daily.  And while I pray that He'll bless my health again, it may not be so.  I just have to realize that His goodness is so much more than the physical.  Sara Groves helped me learn that a little better in her song "Open My Hands".  Maybe there's someone else that needed to hear her song today, and I hope it gives you comfort.


william colin said...

i love you more than my words could ever tell. you are the single greatest blessing god has ever seen fit to give me. i'm with you.

Courtney @ SLBC :) said...

Praying for you, Marla!! Love you!!

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